When Intended Parents Can't Pay

I have been having a little debate with myself. Did I want to blog about this article: http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-me-surrogate-agency21-2009mar21,0,3918452.story?page=1 regarding two California based firms who have stopped paying their surrogates and seemingly taken off with over a million dollars of Intended Parents money or leave it alone and let everyone else chat about it. And then I received an e-mail that pushed me into what I am writing now...a different angle then what I have been reading about in the New York Times or the LA Times....what about the surrogates? With the payments being nonexistent, will they want to keep the babies? This was the question that was asked of me.

Of course that question is coming from the angle that these surrogates are only 'doing it for the money' and now that there isn't any what will happen? Will they keep the babies until there is payment? Will they abort? What happens when Intended Parents can't pay?

Now let me be clear, I know not one person involved in this current scandal. Not a surrogate or intended parent but I believe that what I do know that not one of those surrogates has sat down and thought..Geez..I need to abort because now I will not be paid for my services! Or, I guess I will just keep this baby for myself now that I won't be getting my money...'no money for me means NO baby for you!' I just think that even someone doing it for the money wouldn't go to those extremes. I will go even further out on a limb and say that those surrogates who are pregnant are supporting their Intended Parents through this awful financial loss and saying that something else can be worked out. It will be O.K. Perhaps offering suggestions and ideas of how they all can get through the last months of pregnancy together all the while dealing with the lack of financing.

Remembering that there are still contracts in place and that ins. still needs to be paid, these people all need to work together no matter what happens during the pregnancy. I know that other infertility professionals are offering free or reduced services. There is going to be an auction to help raise funds for the 70 couples and their surrogates who are affected. But I have not heard one story regarding a woman who is planning on holding a baby for ransom..."when you can pay me, you can have him". Remember, Surrogacy is not all about the money. Sure, money helps take care of her while she is pregnant and she can have it ear-marked for certain things she would like to do for her own family but the compensation that Surrogates receive from their willingness to carry a child is not (should not) be the only income coming into the home.

I am hoping that the stories that come out of this current mess puts a huge positive spot light on Surrogates and the compassion that truly runs down to the soul of these wonderful women. Because the real gift here is being tested...and I am sure the rewards will be greater then what anyone has ever expected.